Getting tied up in knots

I've written before about businesses who name themselves by initials, and how they struggle to create brand identity from meaningless letters.

HSA is a case in point. I drove past one of their billboards yesterday and really think their sleeve 'glove' puppet 'Hey Jus' Say' is trying just a bit too hard.

I'm sure someone in the briefing meeting said: "I want something really different and memorable." And the creative teams came back with this idea that ticked all the boxes.

Their previous campaign used the letters as an acronym, which at least made an effort at linking the name and the service provided.

But the problem began a long time before that.

It began when the business started trading with a name that doesn't say what it does 'on the tin'.

Not many ads give you bad dreams...

...but as a child I had recurring nightmares about Bibendum, the Michelin Man, looming into my face and then receding into the distance.



So I was dismayed to see he's back on TV again. Horrible creature.

Is it just me?

Really, truly, bad

I can't stand the Lyclear ad where the 'mum' jumps onto the stage mid-presentation and extols the virtues of a spray that kills head lice AND prevents reinfestation.

There's not a lot that's nice about head lice.

But the ad is just awful.

Mmm, luscious camerawork

Can't you just smell that fresh bread in the new Lurpak ad?

If good food deserves Lurpak, delicious work like this deserves an award.

Cats talk turkey

I love the cute talking cat TV ads for Teletext holidays. Doesn't make me want a Teletext holiday. Does make me want another cat though.

Also reminds me a bit of Lolcats.

What's a Lolcat? Find out at Wikipedia.

"The bells, Esmerelda, the bells!"

I was happy to see Mars new telly ad tips a nod to the well-remembered slogan of my youth – let's all sing along now:

"A Mars a day helps you work, rest and play."

This time, they've taken 'play' a giant step further, with leaping monks bell-ringing to the modern day tune of 'Jump Around'. The slogan is abbreviated to 'Work, rest, play' in Gothic text. A good 'life:work balance' message for us all, methinks.

The ad delighted me on first viewing!

It still makes me smile.

What's more, it makes me want a Mars Bar.

Here it is.

Thriller

I'm sooooo excited to be learning the dance routine to Thriller at my Saturday dance class! And I was even more excited when I searched it on YouTube and found this lizard version. Enjoy!

Who are you kidding?

Why would Asda look to Dad's Army for its price wars TV ad?

The big paper arrowheads are based on the programme titles, and there's a ska instrumental backing track based on the music.

I can't see it / hear it without mentally singing along: 'Who do you think you are kidding, Mr Hitler'.

Surely the Walmart-owned Asda are not suggesting that Jewish-founded Tesco are Nazis?

Note to young people: Dad's Army was a comedy show featuring the Home Guard in the second world war.

Call me old-fashioned

but I don't like seeing ads about, erm, leaky lady gardens* on TV.

You know the kind of ads I mean...for Canesten thrush treatments...Tena Lady incontinence pads...Always sanpro... Makes it seem as though we're all sliding around leaving slimy trails behind us, like snails do.

If you buy a women's magazine, these ads sit there quite happily. Buy a women's magazine, and you know what you're going to get. Ads aimed at women. Anyone else who looks at them gets an insight into a woman's world.

I suppose there should be no secret about these things. But I do feel faintly embarrassed when I see these ads in amidst TV shows that are also watched by men and children.

What if the local priest came round for tea? Your granddad? An enquiring 10-year-old?

Turn the TV off when you get visitors. It's the only answer.

* This expression was inspired by singer KT Tunstall who said she'd blow-dry hers (Al Murray's Happy Hour last week).